Restaurant Etiquette

Dining out can be fun, relaxing, and pleasant. Sometimes, just getting out of the house to meet up with friends—or go out on a date with your partner—to eat good food and enjoy friendly conversation is just the thing a person needs.

With that in mind, I’ve been thinking about the differences in what creates a positive experience as opposed to a negative one. My opinion has been driven by personal observations and interactions. So, here goes:

For the diners

1. If you’re unhappy with your table, speak up right away so the host or hostess can change your seating arrangement with the least disruption. But remember that some restaurants allocate diners to specific sections to allow servers to have the same number of tables.

2. Let your server know beforehand whether there’ll be a single bill or if the check will be split.

3. Let your waiter or waitress know before you order of any food allergies.

4. Don’t make a fuss if the restaurant doesn’t allow for substitutions. Rules are rules, and they probably have their reasons. It isn’t the server’s fault.

5. Tip appropriately and generously. Some people wonder whether to tip based on the pre-tax or post-tax amount. I figure the value of the service shouldn’t depend on the local tax rates, so I tip on the pre-tax amount. But realistically, if you are tipping generously, we’re probably only talking about a small difference at this point.

6. If you’ve finished your meal and have already had left-overs boxed up and squared away your bill, move along. Do not linger for more than an additional 10 minutes. Others may be waiting to be seated and enjoy a meal. If your server returns to the table to ask, “Is there anything else I can get you”, take the hint and take your leave.

For the servers

1. Greet the diners in a cheerful, friendly manner.

2. Be prompt in taking orders.

3. Bring out all of the food at the same time. It’s too awkward when one person’s meal is served first and the others at the table need to wait for their own plates to arrive.

4. Promptly tell patrons of any delays or shortages of certain items so that they’re given the opportunity to order something else.

5. Quickly respond to, and solve, any problems that arise, such as cold food, wrong orders, spilled drinks, etc. Be gracious about it.

6. Do not disparage diners for leaving a tip amount that you disagree with. Yes, servers work hard for their tips, but it’s not an entitlement. It’s a reward for providing excellent service, for going above and beyond the basics.

In order to enjoy a pleasant, seamless experience, diners and servers both need to do their parts in being respectful, reasonable, and polite. Nothing ruins a night out quite like loud, obnoxious, and demanding customers. By the same token, slow or sloppy service can also put a damper on things.

So, go out, have fun, and remember to have your good manners on display.